Advice from an old farmer

My Sunday school lesson today was on "The Two Witnesses", Morning Sermon was on "Life, Death and Eternity" and the afternoon lesson was on "Ruth and Resolve". See the outlines for these on the front page of our church website TLBC.

Hot Air Hand Dryers

My pastor friend put sanitary hot air hand dryers in the rest rooms at
his church and after two weeks, took them out.

I asked him why, and he confessed that they worked fine, but when he
went in there he saw a sign that read, "For a sample of this week's
sermon, push the button."

*****
An Old Farmer's Advice:

* Your fences need to be horse-high, pig-tight and bull-strong. *

* Keep skunks and bankers at a distance.*

* Life is simpler when you plow around the stump.*

* A bumble bee is considerably faster than a John Deere tractor.*

* Words that soak into your ears are whispered...not yelled.*

* Meanness don't jes' happen overnight.*

* Forgive your enemies. It messes up their heads.*

* Do not corner something that you know is meaner than you.*

* It don't take a very big person to carry a grudge.*

* You cannot unsay a cruel word.*

* Every path has a few puddles.*

* When you wallow with pigs, expect to get dirty.*

* The best sermons are lived, not preached.

* Most of the stuff people worry about ain't never gonna happen anyway.*

* Don't judge folks by their relatives.*

* Remember that silence is sometimes the best answer.*

* Don't interfere with somethin' that ain't bothering you none.*

* Timing has a lot to do with the outcome of a Rain dance.*

* If you find yourself in a hole, the first thing to do is stop diggin'.*

* Sometimes you get, and sometimes you get got.*

* The biggest troublemaker you'll ever deal with, watches you from the mirror.*

* Always drink upstream from the herd.*

* Good judgment comes from experience, and a lotta that comes from bad judgment.*

* Lettin' the cat outta the bag is a whole lot easier than puttin' it back in.*

* If you think you have some influence, try orderin' somebody else's dog around.*

* Live simply. Love generously. Care deeply.*

* Never fight an old man. If he is too old to fight, he'll just kill you.*

* Speak kindly. Leave the rest to God.*